Sincerely,
Danny Funwrecker
6th of April
Year of the Dragon

I’m taking the time to blog about all text tattoos due to the overwhelming amount of lettering we’re doing. We often turn down requests for massive amounts of type & I wanted to spell out our very concrete reason as to why that is. This isn’t to discourage anyone from getting tattooed, but rather to look at the broad picture & to help make better tattoo choices.

I realize its a current fad to get scads of text, we see it all the time. And it drives us crazy. Below are bullet points of why.

• TEXT TATTOOS DESTROY THE ART OF TYPOGRAPHY: Just like every other art form, typography has its own rules & limitations. Before computers loaded with hundreds of fonts downloaded for free, typography was a specialized profession, & typographers were very proud crafters of type. Good type is readable because of weight, form, size, leading, tracking, & kerning. Its designed to be read on flat surfaces, with maximum contrast between very dark lettering & very light grounds.

You, dear tattoo client, are not flat white paper. You’re a series of interlocking muscle bands, & you’re covered with skin that is anything but white. You are cylindrical, almost every part of you body is long & rounded. But its not rounded evenly, like a pole, each surface is tapered, being much wider at some points & narrower at others. You’re also topographical, with some points rising & dipping dramatically. On top of all that, you’re also flexible, so unless you’ve been stuffed by an expert taxidermist, the minute you move, you will morph into even more elastic contorted shapes. When you try to apply text to this living organic medium, the lines waver, the letter size changes, the spacing inside the letter closes up, the spacing between the letters & between the words run together. It looks like crap. And Guttenberg spins in his grave.

This is why no one has invented billboards for telephone poles or railings, because no one could read it.

• TEXT TATTOOS FIGHT ANATOMY: The best tattoos, as the Japanese knew hundreds of years ago, work with the body, not fight against it. That’s why they would design full sleeves & body suits with total saturation, & to flow with the muscle groups. This is also why some Asian art may seem two dimensional on paper, but the same art on a body springs to life. Your flesh adds the missing third dimension, & its graphic nature is powerful enough to be seen from across the room. Strong. Powerful. Classic.

Text does the opposite of this. It needs negative space in order to be legible, & since it’s read in lines left to right, it needs to be straight, slicing up all that flowing anatomy into ribbons, graphically speaking. It becomes a visual road block, destroying your natural curves. This is why you don’t see straight lines or geometric shapes in tattoo flash, every flat surface gets twisted, corkscrewed, & warped. That’s not because of all the acid we did in college, its to conform our art with the flow of your physique. If type is snaked along the lines with the muscles, it trashes the leading, & it quickly becomes illegible, & defeats the whole point of getting text.

• TEXT TATTOOS FIGHT GOOD TATTOOING: Good tattoos use a lot of graphic tricks to fight the fact that tattoos are on a curvy stretchy colored surface that will age for up to sixty to eighty years. Good placement (filling up the spot on the body the right way), design (using symbols & graphic tools to maximize an illustrated message), layout (using the given space to its fullest potential), full contrast (going from 100% black to 100% white), color theory (using a full chroma range & complimenting colors for maximum effects) , & elaborate textures are used to create readable, powerful forms the eye instantly recognizes. Text has none of these tools, it takes every one of these tools out of the hands of the artist.

At the end of the day, type, no matter how cool the font, is really just skinny tribal, & look how cool all those 80′s tribal armbands turned out to be.

I had a recent client request map coordinates in his chosen font, which I was happy to do, but before his appointment, he complained that the art was ‘lacking dimension’ & that I should ‘work my magic’ to prevent this. Well, the fact that I was expelled from Hogwarts has nothing to do with the fact that there is no magic to be worked. Map coordinates are basically a lost algebra problem, its simply a series of numbers & letters, & there isn’t anything that’s going to change its static, flat, lifeless nature.

• TEXT TATTOOS EAT UP A LOT OF SKIN: A simple phrase or saying of three or four sentences needs a lot of room to fit on you, & be large enough for us to tattoo properly. In order to read something like that, you need to use up an entire pec, or a quarter of your back. That’s some serious real estate, tattoo-wise. This is the kind of skin that could be used for the kind of award winning masterpieces that collectors wish they still had open skin for. Instead its now filled up with an old grocery list. Large body surfaces look best with large imagery that fills up every pore of skin, not piled up with dozens of tiny words that leaves the skin 90% empty.

• TEXT TATTOOS COCK BLOCK OTHER TATTOOS: Well done, well placed tattoos lend themselves to be added on to at later times easily & artistically. Text tattoos do not. This will drive you crazy when you’re getting this amazing sleeve done by a master, & then it has to end because years before you wrapped your stereo instructions around the best part of your arm. Trust us, every day we’re trying to help people get new tattoos, & have used all the prime cut spots for initials & names, & man, they are not happy.

• THERE’S NO GALLERY OPENINGS FOR FONTS: No one flies to Paris to visit the amazing lettering exhibit at the Louvre. No one buys an Ozzy t shirt because its a whole shirt full of Helvetica. No one covers their bedroom with liner notes. No one buys an album because of the great spelling on the cover. No one ever got wasted, turned on the black lights, & screamed, ‘Damn! Nice kerning!’ No one ever laid back looking at clouds in the sky & said, ‘Palatino Bold Italic!’ The attraction here is art. Art hangs in museums, covers chapel ceilings, jumps off a car or a bus, screams at you from roadside billboards, backs up bands at concerts, sells albums, books, cars, &, well, everything, & is itself sold for millions, collected by rich slobs, & is stolen in famous art heists.

If art screams, text mumbles.

We tell people this all the time. One of the things we used to do was design for the music industry, posters, shirts, album covers,… often we would read the lyrics & listen to the sounds, & create art based on what they were saying, meant, or made us feel. Do the same & you’ll be far happier than if you spelled those lyrics out. Unless your mother is the Amazon rain forest & your father is a paper mill.

No one ever heard of a famous bumper sticker robbery. Which would you rather be, a Picasso, or a post it note?

• ART IS SUBJECTIVE, TEXT IS NOT: One of the magical things about a good tattoo is that its timeless.

I know I’m going to sound like a crotchety old fuck for this one, but I am, & kids, you’re going to change. As you get older, you will change a lot. And just when you get used to that new person, you’ll do it again. This is a good thing. I hope that your life is full & adventurous, & challenges in ways that melts you down & re-crafts you into a strong kickass person the way a master swordmaker folds steel into a katana. No matter who you are at whichever point in time you’re currently residing, your tattoo that once meant one thing to you when you got it, now can offer a different interpretation. The same goes for any number of people viewing your tattoo, they will each see something different. A good tattoo will grow with you.

Text is just about the opposite of this. Words, by their very existence, define. Its why we invented them. Text will lock you in & be far less mercurial than art. There is little to no room for you to play the part of interpreter. Or, if a phrase does offer a number of different meanings, it usually is some gimmicky terrible word play or badly written inspirational saying that belongs on a doily knitted by your grandma, not engraved on your skin. And that definite meaning is not going to travel with you into the future, not the same way fine art does.

• NO ONE WANTS TO READ YOU: There’s been hundreds of times I’ve seen tattoos that blew my mind, either by how well they were applied, or because of the incredible idea, or both. And I’ve been sideswiped with that terrible feeling of, man, I wish that was on me, or I wish I had thought of that. (Stealing other people’s incredibly well thought out tattoos is criminal, a topic for another blog,…) Never once have I ever read a tattoo that had anywhere near that level of impact. Think about how many people refuse to watch foreign films because they “don’t want to READ a movie!” I hate that,… but, in a way, they’re right,… reading the dialogue that is also being spoken takes you out of the moment & fights the medium its in. So does trying to read a person, especially as you try to follow along the curves & bends & decipher small letters hiding away in folds & hollows,… it can be a lot of work, & if the payoff is only some trite bumper sticker verbage, then you have some serious tattoo fail.

• YOU FAILED ENGLISH: A lot of people begin their tattoo consultation with, ‘Well, I’m no artist, but,…’. And then they bow to our expertise in taking their ideas to levels they didn’t think were possible. Not one person ever came in & said, ‘Well, I’m no writer,…’. Why not? A vast majority of the requests we get are things written so badly you’d be held back in the third grade for ten years if it was homework instead of a tattoo. Terrible grammar, broken sentences, redundant word usage,… things that should never be on paper, let alone your body. There are plenty of things we will not tattoo, like all white ink tattoos, UV tattoos, or amateur scribblings. It only makes sense that we’d apply the same ethics to screwed up language. Don’t ask us to make your English teacher cry.

Example: I had a girl come in who wanted Lil Wayne lyrics. Now, his writing style is perfect,… for Lil Wayne. Its meant to be shouted from stage at high volumes by him, with everything he represents, backed by his music, in context. And that’s great. But as far as grammar is concerned? Its not just a crime, its a homicide. C’mon now!

• REMEMBER ‘A PICTURE IS WORTH A THOUSAND WORDS’?: Why pay $500 for fifty words when you can get a THOUSAND for the same price? Its just smart economics!

This would be a good time to talk about adding text to designs. Keep in mind, you’re not a t shirt. If the design is praying hands, in front of a cross, with a crown of thorns, wrapped in rosary beads, that also have another cross, with a dove with an olive branch, & a halo, & shining strata & nimbus,… do you REALLY need to add the word ‘Faith’ to that? You’re kinda already beating that point to death there with that Bible bookstore cluster already. Its about as helpful as adding the word ‘Tattoo’. Art speaks louder than words, friends. Only add text to a design if it adds, enhances, or totally changes the meaning. Otherwise get out of the way of the art!

• AMBIGRAMS: SEE ALL THE ABOVE: Ambigrams are words drawn in such a way that they are words even when flipped upside down, sometimes the same word, sometimes another word. People feel they are terribly clever when the two words are antonyms, like the wide spread ambigram that reads LIFE one way, & DEATH when inverted. But graphically speaking, they’re the worst of everything I’ve just been explaining compounded into one big typographical nightmare. So much liberty has to be taken in order to morph the letters into other letters, they’re rarely if ever legible at all. And nothing says bad art louder than a visual that needs you to stop & explain what people are looking at & can’t read.

• WE KNOW, ITS CHEAPER: Of course it’s cheaper, it’s only squiggly lines. But I wouldn’t tattoo just lines on you, I would explain that without shading & color, it will look weak, incomplete, an empty coloring book. And that’s what we see with a text based tattoo. A budget is a terrible reason to dictate weak tattoo art. Our tattoos are going to be around for a lot longer than your current income level, trust us. Especially when you quit drinking & smoking, & not in a career that requires name tags.

• TATTOOING IS OLDER THAN WRITING: This point is a petty matter of pride, but archaeologically speaking, its true. Tattoos are pre-historic. Older than written languages. It could easily be argued that art is a more immediate & powerful communicator than text. Which is why, for thousands of years & hundreds of cultures, tattoos have always centered around visual imagery, not lettering. Or, maybe it’s just that tattoo artists in 2900 BC couldn’t spell “Bashanhavothjair”. Either way,…

In conclusion,…

• WE’RE NOT HATING ON TEXT: This is not an attack against lettering. Its an attack against an Internet filled with really really bad tattoos, tattoos that try to make their way into our reputable studio. http://ugliesttattoos.failblog.org/. I would’ve been a lousy poster artist if not for text, posters are supposed to explain who, when & where. But I never created a poster for any band that was ONLY text. There are plenty of tattoos that have text attached to them that are killer,… Sailor Jerry’s famous ‘Love Thy Neighbor’, ‘Poison’, ‘Man’s Ruin’, or ‘Stewed, Screwed & Tattooed’. Text is fine in brief, powerful bursts, like Born To Lose, Bad Luck, F.T.W. or F.S.S.F. Or on knuckle tattoos, in an eight letter combo. Text tattoos like this work because they fit into what makes good tattoos, they fit on the body part, & are strong ideas that make their point fast & quick. Your English teacher’s advice of K.I.S.S., Keep It Simple, Stupid, speaks volumes here.

The preamble to the US Constitution is NOT a good choice. And we get requests like this every day. If you’re tattoo idea is falling into a number of the above criteria, we’re going to refuse to do it. We will explain why, of course. And we’re happy to try to guide you into taking your idea & translating it into a graphic visual, or a visual graphic. We can do some amazing things with tattooing, but there are still some limits.

That pretty much sums up what we here at Blue Lotus feel. I personally have spent thousands of hous learning from world famous artists on how to get better and hone my craft. I didn’t take typing class in high school. Maybe I should of. We are artists, let us draw for you.

Respectfully,
Jesse

A piercing will go through the same 3 basic stages most wounds go through during healing.

Stage 1: Inflammatory

During this stage your piercing is an open wound. You may get some bleeding, swelling, tenderness and redness on or around the piercing. These things are all normal. Over the course of the next few days your body works hard to seal off the wound and stop the bleeding. Once the bleeding has been stopped or hemostasis, your body can then start to form and lay down base cells to build upon.

Stage 2: Growth or Proliferation

This stage can take several weeks or even several months depending on the piercing. During this stage your body begins to build on the base or foundation of cells from the first stage. These cells begin to grow from the edges or outside of the wound and travel inwards. As the cells slowly travel towards the center or middle of the wound or piercing they also begin to thicken and grow together. This is what forms your piercing channel or fistula. During this phase it is normal for your body to secret a small amount of clear or slightly yellowish fluid that will often dry on or around your piercing. We refer to this fluid of lymph, dead cells, and the fluid between cells as “crusties”. Even though your piercing channel is formed at the end of this stage, the piercing is still quite fragile. By the end of this phase it is normally considered that initial healing is complete. Your piercer will cover the healing time of your specific piercing with you. It is important to keep your original jewelry in for the entire healing time.

Stage 3: Maturation

This stage takes the longest of all stages; taking months – if not years – and it is common for a piercing to move back and forth between the 2^nd and 3^rd stage. During this stage the cells from Stage 2 become more organized and the fistula strengthens and stabilizes.

You can tell if your piercing has moved from the second to third stage when you no longer have any tenderness or crusties. Remember it is very easy for a piercing to revert back to stage two if the piercing is not treated properly.

The suggested aftercare time frame your piercer gives you will often only take you to the end of stage 2. However, each person’s body is different and will heal differently. Keeping up with a healthy lifestyle and good hygiene are just as important as following through with your aftercare instructions. It is ultimately up to you to help your body heal the piercing.  As a general rule your piercing can heal no faster than the minimum healing time your piercer discusses with you based on current industry standards. You should follow the aftercare instructions for at least the minimum healing time.

This information just skims the surface of the complex nature of wound healing and is not meant to serve as a substitute for medical advice in any way.

As always if you have any questions feel free to contact myself or one  of your friendly neighborhood body modifiers

Myke

Apparently Lindsay Lohan has a white tattoo and at couple times a week I have to tell people why we wont do it and steer them in a different direction. No matter what race or heritage you might be, everybody has pigment in their skin. This is called melanin. It will mix with the ink and turn amber or yellow over time. If you want a tattoo for you and dont want anybody to see it, dont get tattooed.

Staying with celebrities. Actors and musicians dont go to job interviews to impress potential bosses. If someone is willing to tattoo Lil’ Waynes face,fine. If your 18 annd you think you need SHHHHH… on side of your finger. You are mistaken. Faces, necks, fingers, hands, are almost impossible to cover. Also, the skin is a bit different in these areas and will fade faster.How good of an impression are you going to set if you have your boyfriends name on the side of your finger.

Another frequently asked question is black light ink.There is a company that started producing this pigment. It looks like a scar unless your under black light. This company claims that there is no phosphorus in it. But something is making it glow. This cant be good. Originally this techology was developed for tracking animals in the wildlife. So unless your going to spend every second of your life at a rave. Again, not a good idea.

Names are the number one tattoo that is covered. In our industry it is considered a curse to get your partners name tattooed on you.I gaurantee your relationship will fail. People never think about the future, and a young couple in love thinks it will last forever. Wrong. Again, tattoos last forever. Relationships dont. We actually have a shop policy regarding this. Memorials and children are fine. Your girlfriend of 3 months. No.

Finally, lettering and quotes are probably the most tattooed item these days. Bible passages, song lyrics, poems, and other inspirational verses. These are in no way offensive and completely tattooable. To a point. Personally, I really don’t understand why someone wants an entire Hallmark card tattooed on their ribs. If I can make it work as a tattoo, fine I guess. To me its like flash. Pick a font and slap it on. Thanks for the $100. Artists are creatively limited when you want so much text. Let the artist help you with other options. I guess what Im trying to say is that we really don’t consider it a tattoo and will not have membership in our club.

Try to let the artist be creative. Here at Blue Lotus we are a custom shop. We draw everything for you and no flash to pick from. Be original instead of wanting what other people have. Please listen to your artist about options and what will and won’t work. They really do know better than you. Ultimately you will get a better tattoo this way.

Jesse

Also, this has created a multitude of people opening shops and tattooing with no experience or training. This waters down the market and and makes it a lot more difficult for reputable, clean, caring shops to do business and provide safe service for everyone.

PRICE. This is the last thing you should consider when getting a tattoo. There is a sign at our downtown studio that reads, “Good tattoos aren’t cheap…Cheap tattoos aren’y good.” This is 100% accurate! We have high standards and take our industry very seriously. A lifetime of training, seminars, conventions, make artists who they are. You will pay for their knowledge and talents. Don’t be afraid to pay a little extra for quality work. It’ll cost you more money in coverups in the future. Saving $20 isn’t worth getting Hep B.

ABILITY. Every artist at every shop has a portfolio. This is how they show examples of their work. Look closely at it before deciding. Everybody has different styles, so choose one you like. Are lines straight? Are colors bright and solid? Does it look like it’s suppose to?
Remember, YOU are going to live with this forever. Giving your artist a loose idea and letting them use their abilities will give you a better tattoo.

TRUST. The artist should have your best interest in mind. A reputable shop won’t do names. Tattoos are forever. Relationships aren’t. Just because Rhianna has a tattoo on her finger and hands, doesn’t make it a good idea. Listen and let them explain the whys and why-nots of design and placement. Not every tattoo idea is going to look good 3 yrs. from now. Listen to their advice

CLEANLINESS. Ask your artist about sterilization and cross-contamination procedures.The state requires certain guidlines regarding this. Some do the bare minimum and others go beyond state requirements to ensure a safer environment. Look to see if the shop is clean. Ask questions about cleanliness, sterilization. Any shop should be more than happy to answer these questions.

BEING FRIENDLY. Not that everyday is unicorns and rainbows, but your artist and counter staff should be polite and inviting. If your not being treated in this manner or have a ” bad vibe “, maybe that shop isn’t for you. You may be spending a lot of money there and hello, please, and thank you might be nice to hear from them.

In closing, remember, THIS IS PERMANENT. Any cheap price, dirty shop, unfriendly person, is directly relate to the tattoo you are going to get. So ask questions, look at reviews and do your homework.

Please call or stop by either of our locations if you have any questions. See you next month. Same bat time. Same bat channel.

Jesse

Every day I discuss the proper methods and risks involved in expanding lobes, based on what is considered the industry standard. Often improperly referred to as “gauging”, the stretching of ones earlobes should not be entered into lightly, without knowledge, or even worse, going by what your friends say. Each person’s body is different, and while there are suggested timeframes to wait and what aftercare to use, these may not work for everyone.

When you stretch your ears, you separate tissue from its natural state on a microscopic level. These separations or tears are formed in the collagen layer around the circumference of the piercing. These tears take time to heal; in most cases a minimum of 6-8 weeks provided the stretch is cared for properly – 2 or 3 months is often better. If a piercing is stretched too fast or too far, the tears move past the collagen layer which is more likely to form hypertrophic scar tissue. This type of tissue takes much longer to heal and complicates stretching to further sizes.

Many people think there is some sort of magic “point-of-no-return”. They can stretch as fast as they want, to whatever size they want, and their ears will just go back to normal whenever they decide, as long as they don’t go past a certain size. This couldn’t be further from the truth. We measure jewelry in the diameter, but your body will react on circumference. Even in the smaller sizes it is imperative to wait in order to avoid doing what could potentially be irreversible damage. STRETCHING IS NOT A RACE!

A stretch should be preformed and treated in the same manner as a fresh piercing. This means you need to clean and prep the skin, and use the appropriate equipment and materials. Tapers are a common method of stretching piercings. These are not jewelry and are not meant to be worn as such. Jewelry needs to be biocompatible and suited for use in both a fresh piercing and a stretch. Plastic or acrylic should NOT be used. This is also the same for organic jewelry such as wood, bone or horn. These types of jewelry should be saved for after the stretch has healed.

Once a stretch is performed, industry standard aftercare is crucial. A stretch is a wound that requires care and attention. Even if your stretched lobe piercing is healed, it is a good idea to massage and condition the area daily. The use of certain types of oils can be highly beneficial.  If you have stretched a piercing you know about “the smell”; that is called sebum, and is produced by your body’s sebaceous glads. While perfectly normal, it does tend to have an unpleasant odor. Try out jojoba oil! Not only does it make your lobes feel great, but it displaces sebum. Be sure to check the label, organic and unscented is best, and of course check for allergies as well.

If you have questions about stretching stop by and see myself or one of our friendly neighborhood body modifiers!

Best,

Myke

http://www.secondharvestmadison.org/YouCanHelp/FoodFundDrives/~/media/WIMadison160/Files/MostNeededItems_082011.ashx

With Summer almost here there is no better time to stop by and check out our Swarovski Gem Navel curves, or HUGE selection of organic jewelry for your ears in a vast array of sizes. Don’t worry we didn’t forget about you unstretched “normal” folks too.

• Marilyn
• Medusa
• Septum
• Bridge
• Daith
• Anti-tragus
• Snug

Our Tattoo apprentice, Tyler is still taking apointments for tattoos for $25